...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
