dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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