U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
