You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Randomize
