Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
