Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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