marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
