She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
