Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I'm like, not good at living.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
