your thong is hanging out like whoa
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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