did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize