Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize