so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
