how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
i think my cat just said my name.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
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