champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
