no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
