whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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