The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
