Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I am one with the molecules
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
