Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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