Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Randomize
