Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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