I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
So apparently I’m into choking now
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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