shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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