It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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