wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
