Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
