I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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