I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize
