Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
