i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
whose ass print is on the piano?
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
