last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
