You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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