hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
You are a booty call, not a friend.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
