Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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