we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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