dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
soo... how was my night?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
