where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
