i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
