oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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