she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize
