But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
