Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
