sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Randomize
