Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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