u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Your cock deserves a montage
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
