I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
