whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize