So drunk, too bad you don't want this
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
