I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Randomize
